Registering your baby's birth and death

It seems inappropriate and can feel overwhelming to have to think of paperwork at a time like this. But if your baby died after he or she was born, then registering the birth and death of your baby is a legal requirement. Some parents find that it helps reconfirm their baby's brief existence.

Why is registration important?

If you are able to think of the registration process as simply a way of confirming officially that you are your baby's parent, then it may make the task easier. By registering your baby, his/her existence is officially acknowledged and set in writing for records to show in years to come.

If your baby died within 28 days of being born alive, you will receive a Medical Cause of Death Certificate from the hospital. You must take this along with some other information to the office of the Registrar for Births, Marriages and Deaths within five days (eight days in Scotland) of your baby's death.

This time restriction can feel particularly bewildering, when you are reeling from the shock of your loss and particularly if you have only just returned from hospital. But once you have registered your baby's birth and death (each goes into a different registration book) you will be given a certificate for burial or cremation, which you will need to bury or cremate your baby.

Your local Registrar

You can find your local register's office by searching for it on your local county council's website. Most registrars work on an appointment basis. Although the system will one day be improved so that registration can be done both online and by telephone, this addition has yet to be adopted.

The rules for registration are slightly different for England and Wales , Scotland and Northern Ireland and it's always worth contacting your nearest registrar and double checking the requirements. Here is a broad description of what registration entails.

Who can register your baby

If you and your partner are not married and the father wants his surname to be entered on the register, then both parents can go and sign the birth and death registers together. If the father is unable to go but still wants his name in the register, then he can sign a form of declaration (available from the registrar) acknowledging his paternity.

If the parents are married but neither is able to go to the register's office, then you can contact the registrar for advice. It may be that a professional caring for you, an occupant of the house where the baby died occurred, or indeed a family member is qualified to register your baby in your place.

If you try to remember to bring all the required information with you, it will limit the time and stress that registration can involve.

Information the Registrar requires

• The Medical Cause of Death Certificate
• The date and place of the birth and death of your baby
• The baby's age if he/she lived less than 24 hours
• The baby's name (you must decide this before you go to the registrar)
• The parents' full names, occupations (if any), usual address(es), place of birth and date of marriage (if married).

The Registrar will enter the baby's name in both the birth and death registers before giving you a certificate for burial or cremation. You can have a certificate of the registration free of charge if you ask for one but there is generally a fee for obtaining a copy of the birth and death certificates.

Contacts and websites for registration

If, having read the information about registering your baby, you still have questions, do ring you local registrar for clarification or check the following websites for information:

England and Wales: http://www.gro.gov.uk/gro/content/
Scotland: http://www.gro-scotland.gov.uk/index.html
Northern Ireland: http://www.groni.gov.uk/index.htm (Northern Ireland has no specific information on registering a stillbirth and it may be worth calling your local registrar's office if you are uncertain.)