At any time after the death of your baby, from hours after to many years later, you may find that you need to talk to someone, besides family or friends, about what has happened and how you feel.

You may want to ring a confidential Helpline, or talk to another bereaved parent. We have details of how to get in touch with the kind of support that is right for you.

Helpline  020 7436 5881   helpline(at)uk-sands.org

When your baby dies it can sometimes to difficult to talk with those around you about what has happened. Our helpline provides a safe places where there is someone to listen to you or just be with you when you need it.

"My need to speak to someone who had 'been there' was overpowering. I found myself on the phone to a woman whose baby, like mine, had died. 'Tell me about your baby,' she said and I found myself pouring my heart out to a perfect stranger with whom I felt an instant connection."

You may want information or help in making decisions, especially in the days after your baby's death. Our experienced helpline team can offer support and will give you time and space to talk about what you want to do.

We know it can be difficult to pick up the phone and you are welcome to email or write to use instead. Many family members, friends and health professionals also contact us for information, advice and support.

Sands befrienders and groups  

Many parents feel that although people can sympathise, others who have experienced the death of a baby can offer real understanding and empathy for what you are going through. Meeting other bereaved parents who have had a similar experience can help you to feel less isolated. 

"I thought I was the only person in the world who had a baby that had died"

Sands has a network of around 90 local support groups throughout the UK and ten affiliated overseas groups. The groups are run by bereaved parents who are past the first year of their own experience and have attended Sands befriender training. Most of the groups offer support meetings, telephone support, and/or a home visit if you would like one.

Sands befrienders play an important role in offering parents the opportunity to meet and share their experiences with other bereaved parents.

If you would like to meet with other parents, we can put you in touch with a local Sands' contact in your area. Call the Sands helpline (020 7436 5881) or our head office (020 736 7940) to find out who your local group is. Some of the groups, but by no means all, have their own websites.

Groups often organise ways of remembering the babies who have died in their area. This may be by arranging memorials services, or finding funding for a memorial plaque, bench, statue or garden.

Further support

Sometimes bereavement can bring other personal issues to the surface. If you feel you would prefer to speak to an independent counsellor, your GP should be able to refer you to one in your area. You may find that there is a waiting list.

Alternately you could get in touch with your local branch of Cruse Bereavement Care by contacting their central office on 0208 939 9530, or looking at their website www.crusebereavementcare.org.uk.

To see a private counsellor in your area you could contact the British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy at www.bacp.co.uk. Click on 'find a therapist' then just type in your postcode and the site will give you a list of therapists local to where you live.

If you need to speak to someone urgently during the night you can call the Samaritans on 08457 90 90 90 or email jo(at)samaritans.org 24 hours a day.

There may be other issues you would like to investigate regarding the cause of your baby's death. Within other support links you may find an organisation which can help you.

In personal experiences you will also find the stories of many other families.