There are choices you can make about what happens to your baby and to you in the early hours and days of their death. It may feel hard to take in the reality of what is happening and to know what you want. However the memories of this short time with your baby before you must say goodbye will be very important to you for the rest of your life.

Below is a list of suggestions of things you can do, which other parents in this situation have found helpful. They are things you might not have thought of, or did not realise were possible.

These choices are very personal; there is no right or wrong and no-one can tell you what is right for you. You may feel unclear about what you want, and need time to think about it. You may find that you and your partner think differently, or that you keep changing your mind. Take your time, and remember that health professionals are there to talk through these decisions with you.

• Seeing and holding your baby
• Dressing and bathing your baby
• Naming your baby
• Other children and family
• Creating memories
• Keepsakes
• Taking your baby home
• Getting a copy of your notes
• Talk to someone
• Read and listen to